T

Brevity is the soul of wit--and the sole charm of a bicycle skirt.


TAILOR  One who takes your measure on first sight, gives you a fit,
sews you up and follows suit until paid.

TALK  A continuous performance playing daily and nightly
engagements, with Woman as the star and Man confined in the Family
Circle.

TELEGRAM  A form of correspondence sent by a man in a hurry and
carried by a boy in sleep.

TELEPHONE  From Eng. tell, to talk, and Grk. phonos, murder.  A
machine in which talk is murdered.

TENNIS  A game in which the participants enjoy a racket on the side
and raise the deuce over a net, while the volleys drive them from
set to set and love scores as often as it's mentioned.

TEMPER  A quality, the loss of which is likely to make a knife
blade dull and a woman's tongue sharp.

THERMOMETER  A short, glass tube that regulates the weather--and
usually does a poor job.

THIRST  A sensation immediately following a short session at the
free lunch stand.

TIDE  An old friend who comes and goes daily but is all in whenever
he gets over the bay.

TITIAN  The color a poor red-headed girl's hair becomes as soon as
her father strikes oil.

TIPS  Wages we pay other people's hired help.

TOBACCO  A nauseating plant that is consumed by but two creatures;
a large, green worm and--man.  The worm doesn't know any better.

TONGUE  An unruly member that is frequently put out, yet an artist
who's a hard worker at the palate and a great wag among women.

TOUCH  A habit common to the impecunious, causing in its victim a
feeling of faintness, followed by a chill or a sense of loss.

TRANSFER  A small bit of paper of remarkable strength, being able
to carry a heavy man several miles.

TROLLEY-CAR  A conveyance filled with advertisements, and
occasionally passengers, and operated by Poles.

TROUBLE  Something that many are looking for but no one wants.

TRUST  A small body of capital entirely surrounded by water.

TWINS  Insult added to Injury.

TWISTERS  An undesirable thing to have on hand.


Its a wise son who can get two birds with One Bone.

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